1. Know your recipient: Get Ideas and write them down — immediately.

The most important part of buying a gift is the idea. Nowadays, there are many ways to stalk friends and family. Whether it be through Facebook, Twitter, Myspace, e-mail, chat and old fashioned get togethers, you can get a good idea of what sort of things would be of interest to them. I keep a small moleskine notebook that I carry around for various reasons, and when an idea comes to me, I write it down in a section that I have dedicated for “Gift Ideas”. Instead of scrambling around last minute, stressing out about what to purchase, I can just refer to the list and familiarize myself with what are some of the “likes” of that person. This is especially useful when it may be someone you don’t see very often. It can contain various subjects – ie, a certain list could be like this:

The list has items that are broad yet specific enough to help one gather ideas for a gift. For example, it might give you ideas if they are not too expensive. One example I think is great are photobooks, especially if the recipient enjoys taking photos. Putting a collage of photos together from their vacation, or a selection of their best photos (if you can find a way to access their photos, by way of a friend, etc.) and use a service such as Shutterfly it would make a great gift. Of if you have a penchant for art, try drawing something, or creating something that might be useful. For example, if you can’t afford anything, but have a few art skills, perhaps painting “The Cure” might be something John might value from the list above. Or if you have some fancy knitting or sewing skills, make a shirt, or a nice scarf (not the ones your granny might make!)

2. Set out an agreement on a price limit and exchange a wish list

Though this isn’t very fun, setting an agreement on the max limit of a price also helps minimize the pressures of “how much to spend on so and so”. This doesn’t always work, but for example, one of my best friends and I have been exchanging gifts for years, in exactly this manner. Both our birthdays are in the Fall, so we usually combine the birthday gift and the Christmas gift together. We also live in different states, so this makes the process much easier, instead of having to mail presents two times within two months. Every year, prior to the holidays, we also exchange wish lists of items that we’re either wishing or hoping for, so I rarely ever worry about what to buy her.

3. Keep a gift budget by saving throughout the year

Find that you go over budget often when picking out presents? I used to have that problem. In the last five or so years, I found that spending a little bit more on an item on something I knew the receiver would like was worth more to me than spending under budget for a gift that I knew would just sit in their garage or gather dust. For example, I bought my best friend a digital camera one year, knowing she wanted and needed one. She and I agreed that would be her gift that would cover the next two years. In another blog I read a year ago, someone suggested budgeting for a “Gift Fund”. I thought that was a terrific idea, and I went ahead and started putting $25 every two weeks into this fund (an ING savings sub-account). Whether or not this was too much, I could always tweak the numbers as I saw fit. As a result, anytime I needed to purchase a gift – whether it be for a wedding, a birthday, a holiday, it would be out of that fund. I could get smaller or larger gifts as long as I had the money in my sub account to fund it. It has made it much easier, and does not hurt as much (though I have difficulty watching any of my money being moved out of my accounts, but that’s for another post…)

4. Wait for deals, a sale, a price drop, or a coupon

Once you have an ideas list for those on your gift giving list, you can start shopping at ANY time for a gift. I’ve bought Christmas gifts this year during the summer. Being that you already have ideas, you can determine what the normal price for something may be, and you can monitor the prices and wait until a good deal comes around or a coupon is available before purchasing.

Here are a few sites that I use to monitor deals:

If you’re monitoring a specific web site for a specific product to drop in price, ShoppingNotes will notify you when the price has changed (either higher or lower.)

If you shop on Ebay, this will also make you less desperate (assuming that the item you’re looking for is being listed more than once), and give you time to bid for what you’re looking for at the price you’re willing to pay and not the other way around. You’re far from your deadline, so there will be less stress. Of course, this doesn’t always apply, as some events are time sensitive (like a concert, a musical, play, etc.), but for the most part, they will work.

For the most part, I tend to shop online more than in the retail stores. That’s not to say there aren’t some fantastic deals to be had at the Brick & Mortar (that can be evident by browsing the deal sites), but many times online, I feel I can do research via the reviews on Amazon, Newegg, and do a price comparison via Google, without feeling a bit blind at the store, not knowing what is available. Also, in addition to getting better prices by purchasing online, there are places that give cashback for buying online, just for using their service. I tend to use places like Ebates and MrRebates, Bing cashback though there are plenty more who provide this service. At the same time, these sites also show you what coupons are available from a certain retailer.

5. Wrap your gift – wrapping paper

This is, oddly, my most difficult task – finding affordable gift wrap paper. I find most wrapping paper to be over priced, unless I rush in the day after December 25 and grab whatever discounted wrapping paper is left from either Target, Macy’s Home and Furnishings, or some similar store. That is great for Christmas, but what about all the other special occasions? You could always make your own wrapping paper (out of tin-foil, paper with your own drawings), or you could always buy it wholesale. One example - Mr Gift Wrap – but they do provide obscene amounts of wrapping paper. Another would be Superior Gift Wrap.

If you follow all the above tips, especially the very first suggestion, Gift Giving should be at the very least, no longer a stressful event. It’s not perfect, as some people are just difficult to purchase, but perhaps this might minimize the scary task to a more manageable one, making your life simpler.

What is your system for gift giving? And I need help – where is the best place to buy wrapping paper?

I only have a small room to deal with, but it seems as though the “stuff” seems to build up, and build up. My last public battles helped during the time, but I find that I have difficulty sticking with a plan. I devote a weekend, and things seem to be okay, but I then fall back into the traps of papers, books, junk mail just thrown around, in hopes that I will one day “look at it again”.

For inspiration, I usually visit Unclutterer’s Workspace of the Week to get at my clutter, not only to be neat, but dust-ball free. I also look to A&E’s Television show Hoarders sometimes to get myself moving. These people do not describe the general population, but have a sickness of hoarding and being unable to detach themselves from any of the objects they own, including garbage. It’s eye-opening, sad, yet strangely motivating at the same time.

So join me in my goal to a start of a clean free, dust free, clutter free area!

After a few bumps in the road, I’ve finally got this web site up and running, and I’ve got lots of things to say and share. I know delayedllama has asked me several times about it, and I almost forgot it, had we not had a discussion about goals this morning. Plus, I’ve missed writing about topics that truly matter to me.

So let’s hope this continues and there are no bumps in the future thanks to my forgetful brain!

I’ve read countless posts and an excellent book by How To conquer the clutter. One of my favorite sources for organization is “Organizing From the Inside Out” by Juliet Morgenstern.

The following tips I found to be incredibly useful:

1) Ask yourself: Do you need it? Do you love it? When was the last time you looked at it?

If your answer is a yes, no and don’t remember, it might be about time the item was either thrown away, sold, or donated.  Many of the books on my shelf have not been touched in many years. They’ve taken up lots of space and dust. Perhaps some of you are in the same boat as well. Lots of items might have meaning, but did you really remember you had it until you actually saw it? This is not to say that one should throw out their great grandma’s family heirloom, but realistically, if you haven’t seen the darn thing in years and only remember it when you look at it, perhaps it’s high time you got rid of it. This applies to not only books, but magazines, pamphlets, dvds, cds, and a whole slew of small little objects that might be hiding in your closet. What’s stocked up in my closet is .. .believe it or not: letters. I still have not been able to part with them.

I have so many souvenirs – the playbills from theatres, small little pamphlets from the vacations I’ve been on, all in hopes that I will one day scrapbook my memories. Honestly, they should all go in the trash, because that trip from Europe was one and a half years ago, and there are other things in the same bag from 7 years ago. It takes up not only the space, but it constantly occupies the back of my mind as “one more thing I have to do”. Either I do something with it, or throw it out.

2. Conquer one area at a time.

It’s easy to get distracted by certain things in the home. You take one piece of paper and take it to another to recycle. But you see another mess to deal with and start dealing with that mess. You walk from that mess to another mess. Sit down and just deal with one area. Sort the clutter by “keep, sell, donate, throw, recycle.” Other systems may have different labeling schemes, but the idea is fairly simple. Label it however you want, but stick to the labels. One you have cleared out one area, move to the next. One doesn’t have to do the entire home in one day, and wouldn’t even be suggested. It’s easy to get discouraged.

3. Set Goals.

Make realistic, attainable goals. Judging by the amount of clutter or excess material a room may have, you have to make realistic goals in order to reach the main objective. If a room is filled with piles of clutter, you can’t really expect for it to be clean in one day. Instead, make more specific goals. “Today, I will look at this pile of paper and decide what to do about it. If I finish that, I will organize all the outstanding mail that I have yet to open.” Start small and work your way up.

4. Organize a bit everyday.

People tend to wait for some big “spring cleaning” event before they tackle the piles of clutter occupying their room. However, if they spent just 15-30 minutes a day to clean a different portion of their home once they’ve got everything cleared out, it’s possible to maintain the same level of cleanliness.

5. Containers are your friend.

Buy filing cabinets to store your important papers – whether it be bills, your paychecks, information about your healthcare, registration information. These kinds of information deserve to be in its own secure place and it really helps if you keep this organized. A file box such as this one works fairly well, and it’s easy to take with you in case there is ever a disaster. (I lugged this with me when a fire evacuation and it was invaluable.) As for pens, stationary, if you do crafts, there are many one dollar stores that sell small container boxes for an affordable way of organizing all the small little items that are hard to keep track of. Don’t forget to buy little sticker labels, because once you’ve placed your items in your containers, it sure will be hard to figure out which container you used to place the item you were looking for!

6. Buy less.

It doesn’t help if you your area is clean and organized if you keep on buying new things that you don’t need that will adds to the mess.

7. Cut down on the credit card mailings and advertisements and paper in general.

I don’t know about you, but I used to receive plenty of credit card mailings. Not only was it an annoyance it was a pile up of wasted paper. I mentioned earlier on how to Opt Out of Credit Card Offers, and the same link applies to retail mailings.

8. Clear out and pack up your clothes depending on the season

Wardrobe Oxygen wrote up an excellent article on choosing the right clothes for you, and only purchasing clothes that you love and looks good on you. Typically this applies mostly to females, but may apply to males as well. Before packing up your clothes into a container for the season, evaluate whether you really like that piece of clothing you are putting away. It’s better to have a group of great fitting clothes that you love and will last for years to come than pieces that are maybe “a bit too itchy”, “a bit uncomfortable”, “sits a bit off”. Instead of occupying so much space, it might be better off just being donated.

Not only do physical places have the problem of clutter, but virtual places as well. At the workplace, I’ve found many computers to be just cluttered beyond recognition. In addition to how to list and sell things on Craigslist, eBay, Half.com, look for a post on de-cluttering your computer hard drive.

Have any other tips to de-cluttering? How do you approach the clutter in your life?

I am not free of affluenza. I feel the strong daily pulls of the media and the people around me trying to suck me in. But, having grown up with traditional Chinese parents and in recent years, volunteering with an incredible group Tzu Chi, my desires of consumption and burying myself away from the community constantly fight the other more happier, conscious side of myself. A few years ago, I read an excellent book that my wonderful brother shared with me, titled “Affluenza” that really got me thinking about consumption and the direction that this country was heading. Recently, the author David Wann wrote an even better book “Simple Prosperity”, discussing the ways to get rid of affluenza, a book of which I have just started reading, but will definitely share with the rest of you.

Let me make a few points clear. Before any one decides to label me, I am not Buddhist. Though Tzu Chi is a Buddhist organization, any one of any race, ethnicity, and religion can join. It was brought about because the leader, Master Cheng-Yen wanted to pursue to get rid of pain and suffering in the world while also educating the more fortunate. Part of this was by saving and living an extremely simple life. Her belief has caused many people to join her in her mission, and many result in living much simpler but happier lives. What I say is revelant because it is in part of my discovery of Tzu Chi that helped me to truly understand what the world could be like if people let go of their desire to consume, put their differences aside, open their hearts and connect with their community. I always thought it was a pipe dream, but I have seen it happen. Because of the strong affinity I have with this organization, I may share a few very basic teachings and principles in future entries that apply to the idea of living simpler.

Upon reading this, readers may pigeonhole me to be either left or right, or however you like to see it. I constantly encounter this at the place of my work. I choose to believe that I am neither left or right. I’d rather say I am a compassionate and sometimes too passionate of a person who wants to believe that there is a better way of life than the life so many people in this world is blindly leading with dollar signs and profit margins in their eyes. I am often surrounded by blatant selfishness, and by this, I can start to feel the poison seep into my mind and I have to catch myself.

I hope that with this blog, with all of you, we can together bravely walk into a world where we can live a happier, simpler life. I don’t want this to be a site only about personal finances, de-cluttering, or organizing one’s life. These are all components of the resulting bigger picture: personal growth and self-empowerment, of self-discovery, of becoming more compassionate, of understanding and most of all, choosing happiness – for yourself and every one around you.

1. Pay off your debt and immediately start saving. Money is a huge factor that cause the stress in people’s lives. Get your finances in order. Especially now, with our weak economy, it is important to get all your ducks in a row. Though this is said plenty of times in other web sites, the key really is to spend less than you make. The less you spend, the more you will have. Create a budget if you need some way to control your finances.

2. Remove external influences as much as possible. Stay away from advertisements. Avoid commercials if you can. Change the channel when a commercial is on. Get rid of those magazines that will tempt you to even start thinking about wanting to buy. (This is a weakness I have, due to perusing SlickDeals all the time.) This helps not only your wallet, but there will not be the latest “wants” rolling around in your head of things you want to buy. Subconsciously, commercials and advertisements may be telling you that you’re not spending enough, that you’re not keeping up with the Joneses unless you have product A or B, therefore causing you more stress. Brave advertisements only if you have enough strong discipline to stay away from what the message of the clever marketers, but it’s strongly cautioned against from this lady. If you have friends that you go shopping with that are bad influences, find other activities you guys can do together without spending money.

3. Educate yourself. Many times the unknown causes undue stress and worry. Sometimes, a little research, asking friends and family for information, and finding all about what is causing your stress can really set your mind at ease.

4. Part with all that “stuff”. Sell it via eBay, Craigslist or donate it. I find the cleaner, more organized your home is, the more free and peaceful your mind becomes. Have you ever walked into a show home and felt so at peace and comfortable? Granted, it’s decorated nicely, but these homes have no clutter since they’re new. They have no objects or things or clutter from all the possessions  But the thing is, I’ve walked into homes that are fairly clean and well organized. People have argued that they don’t like these kind of upkept homes because it looks like no one lives there, but I would argue that the people who live in that home probably has a mind that probably is much more free of stress. I find when my work and sleep areas become buried in stuff, I don’t sleep as well. Clear your closet, clear your mind.

5 Take action now. If you need to do something, or want to do something, do it. (Well, unless it’s finally caving for that gadget you “must must” have!) Don’t wait until tomorrow, or the next day. We’ve all become professional procrastinators. I know this is something I definitely lag on, especially in scheduling my dentist/doctor’s/eye doctor’s appointment. I hate going to the doctor.

6. Volunteer. I find that this has a strong influence on the amount of money I spend, and the toughness of my mind. I’ve volunteered all my life and now volunteer at a group that covers a wide area of charity (recycling, environment, education, medical outreach, international relief, clean-up, etc.) Volunteering allows one to perhaps open one’s eyes to the world around them, the living situation of the poor, and to be thankful for what you do have. One may start to realize that what they worried about just the day before, probably isn’t that important to worry about any more. Volunteering can cause one to be very busy, therefore not causing you to spend more money, keeps you on your toes, and actually makes you feel good. I realize not everyone likes to volunteer, but I think it really helps free your mind. This is a subject I’m fairly passionate about, though I do feel guilty for not volunteering more.

7. Exercise and Eat Better. Do yoga, pilates, meditate, increase endorphins. We know that exercise really helps induce endorphins and helps diminish one’s stress levels. Not only will exercise help you with your stress, but one will become healthier.The same applies with food. It is sad that certain foods may cause you to become moody, which may add to stress. With a better diet and a good exercise regimen and the affects of both on health, who can argue with this?

8. Balance yourself. This is probably one of the most difficult aspects of going worry-free. By “balancing” yourself, I mean not to disturb your chi. While talking to my friends, I find their complaints range all over the place – to their relationships, their workplace, their friends, their pockets, their job – the list goes on and on. One should either a) do something about it to change the situation or c) let it go. It’s human nature to complain. It’s even more female nature to complain because we want to vent. My male friends so often complain to me how females need to vent, and how it surprises them how they don’t want to fix the situation. I’m probably guilty of the situation too – by complaining or making excuses. (More the latter than the former). However, I truly believe that if you can’t control an undesirable situation — either try to change it, or let it go. Venting is all well and good – especially the first few times, but after that, it does nothing to help with your being. For example, for the longest time many of us were disgruntled by the actions of one of our closest friends – let’s say his name was Ben. For a period of time, a few of us would go on and on about how angry we were and couldn’t believe what our friend’s actions — and this would go on every night.  One especially was letting it affect her to the point where she wanted to yell, scream and make a few drastic reactions. However, I reached the point where I knew I had to talk to Ben. Well, I spoke with him, and Ben just didn’t get why we were all feeling the way we did. At this point, I let it go, knowing it would not go anywhere and knowing I had done all that I possibly could. Not only would I be wasting my breath if I continued, I would be wasting my energy discussing about something Ben was doing when Ben himself wasn’t thinking too much about it at all. Bottom line – don’t let things bother you when you have no control over the situation. Accept it and then move on. You’ll be happier that you did.

9. Most importantly, change your attitude. This encompasses a great many things. Desire less. Want less. Be content with what you have. Open your heart. It can be surprising the amount of stress and worry can dissipate when you simply change your attitude. This is the single most important lesson we all can learn. This not only applies to stress but in so many other aspects of our lives.

This was extremely long winded, and the things I listed certainly are not the only things one can do to try to be free yourself from stress. What are some things you do to relieve yourself from stress?

When will Americans learn never to spend money they don’t have? The credit culture in America, though by all accounts was a good idea in the beginning, has created nothing but a disaster. Nothing about it has been positive. Swiping that plastic is much easier than handing cash. Cash = something real, solid, real money in one’s hand. Credit = pure plastic, fake money, debut money. It is said that most families have an average debt of $8,000.

The number of people who live paycheck to paycheck is apalling. Using their credit card to pay for something they don’t have in their bank account baffles my mind. It’s no wonder that the United States government has turned out the way it has. $12 trillion DEBT. We owe so many countries money. One day, they’ll stop buying U.S. bonds and then what?

I don’t know what people can do really, what solutions there are. I know a start would be to cut up those credit cards, and to stop spending as though there seems to be a money tree in our homes. Minimize, minimize, minimize. Find other forms of entertainment – volunteer, spend more time in the kids, go out for a hike, a walk.  I’m hoping though, that this rush of affluenza and the love affair with credit cards in this country will stop. Maybe this is the wake-up call that everyone needs. If it’s not, I don’t know what kind of state the country has to be in before someone decides to change their spending habits and their lifestyle.

I often peruse SlickDeals.net for a great deal on something that I am in search for. Lately, it’s been the Logitech Z-5500, 5.1 speakers for the computer. I was searching for it because I thought my current speakers were dying, due to crackling heard everyday. But because of this, I end up reading on other things, such as Western Digital’s My Passport Essential Portable HDD and the Back-to-School promotion ending tomorrow by Apple.

The Passport Essential I actually do need, but the deal wasn’t as great, so … after placing the items in my cart not once, but twice, I decided to forget it. I told myself that a better deal would come along, and only until people rate the deal five stars would I bite. The Apple promotion is to buy a MAC and to receive an iPod Touch free (new generation). I’ve always wanted a Mac and even though I’d be selling the iPod Touch, there was no reason whatsoever for me to purchase one and especially right now. So, there again, I found myself placing the items in my cart, but  ended up just closing the browser as well.

Self-control. Self-discipline.  On Friday, I came across two excellent financial blogs – Get Rich Slowly and Free Money Finance, both blogs stressing frugality as being the best way to grow the cash in your wallet. Both blogs talk about ways to save money and creating a budget. After reading a few posts, I was convinced I would be wasting my money on items that certainly are overpriced. It also prompted me to transfer more of my paycheck from my checking account to my money market fund, so I would only have 18% of my paycheck to play around with. Honestly, I rarely ever use over 18% per month which is whyI’m thinking that’s still too much. Because the less I have in my checking account, the less inclined I would be to whip out my credit card and waffle over purchases. I’ve now added those two links to our blogroll.

Also this weekend, I went back to listing some of the no longer needed items laying around my house on eBay. Not only will I be making some extra money, I’ll also clear out some of this clutter that never seems to go away.

Are any of you feeling the urge to spend? What have you guys been doing to stop it?

ASUS EEEPC, $399
MyPower Universal Rechargeable, approx $129
Tokina Wide Angle Lens $450
Palm Tungsten E2 $72 (Ebay)
Wrestling Tickets $300 (Anniv. present)
Plecodict Software $119

Plus other miscellaneous items in the past three months. I don’t regret buying any of the items except for the MyPower which I may end up selling on ebay. I thought it would be useful in powering my laptop, my DS, my camera, but when it came to it, I realized that the only thing I would really use it for was my laptop during an airplane flight. I used it twice. But I just don’t travel very much. I have enough gadgets to keep me fairly occupied on a long flight.

What I do regret however, is buying them in such close vicinity together at their given prices. I tried to rationalize each of the purchases – the ASUS EEEPC being a terrific travel companion when travelling in Taiwan – which it was. The MyPower Battery for the airplane (which it wasn’t). The Tokina – a lens I had told myself I would purchase after going to Europe and missing that wide view, went to Taiwan, still found I really missed it on so many shots that I immediately came back and purchased the Tokina so I wouldn’t miss it for futher trips. Palm + Plecodict – hey, I need to learn Chinese after purchasing a Chinese novel. And wrestling tickets – couldn’t think of anything else as an anniversary gift! Everything had its rationale but at the same time, none of it was rational.

I’ve often prided myself on being frugal with my money, but lately, I’ve been missing the ball and it’s frustrating to me. I list all my expenses in a spreadsheet to help me budget, but lately, even looking at the numbers add up in my spreadsheet, it hasn’t prevented me from really stopping on the gas so to speak. I always tell myself “next month, next month I will do better” when I overstep my bounds in the current month. I’m not in debt or anything, but I’ve always thought being more simple brought me the same amount of happiness. In fact, I spend so much time charging my gadgets, syncing them, organizing my pictures, correcting my pictures, uploading my pictures, burning files. Most of my leisurely time is spent organizing and maintaining instead of enjoying. I sometimes think about how much more social I might be if I had nothing at home that it would force me to go out and interact with my peers and heaven forbid, meet new people.

I find writing this right now truly is keeping in check. So today, as I write this, I vow not to spend more than $200 next month (this month I’ve already failed) not counting gas but including going out to eat.

Have any of you been having one of these months as well? Where you tell yourself to stay within a limit, but you not only go over but way over? What makes us do things we know we will regret? Where’s our discipline? Don’t we consciously know that we won’t really receive any direct happiness of long-term pleasure from what we are purchasing but just very short term or superficial?